Housos add Racism to Misogyny: SBS

Written by Benjamin Thomas Jones on June 19th, 2013

With SBS refusing to address misogyny and death threats, the Housos Facebook page has added racism to their repertoire.

In the wake of sexual harassment and institutional sexism scandals, Australian Chief of Army David Morrison earned the respect of many with his sincere apology to the victims and denouncement of the offences. It is not only those who commit vile acts against women that are to blame, he reminded us. Those who laugh it off, turn a blind eye or dismiss sexism or racism tacitly endorse it. Morrison challenged us all to be leaders, declaring that, “the standard you walk past is the standard you accept”.

What standards does the SBS hold? Independent Australia has broken three stories listing the vile sexism and even death threats against Prime Minister Julia Gillard that are not only tolerated but prompted and supported by the Housos Facebook page. SBS may well stand for Silent ‘Bout Sexism. They have done nothing in response apart from attempt to censor Independent Australia and request that no more complaints be received.

SBS has sent a clear message to the Housos Facebook page: you can do or say anything as we lack the courage or will to stop you. The Admins responded in kind with a blantent display of racism.

Yesterday, the page posted a picture of Maori actor Kevin Takamata – one of the stars of the show – next to a picture of a man in a monkey costume with the caption, “Kev’s Long Lost Brother”.

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Over 2000 people liked the picture, 2 claimed it was racist. Those two were then subjected to the usual torrent of abuse that flows in the direction of anyone who challenges the Housos page. The Housos Admin even stepped in to repudiate the claim stating:

“How is that racism ? All Maoris look like a banana split ? Go back to political correct land !”

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The Admin was doubtless trying – and failing – to be funny. The monkey costume was originally worn on an American children’s show from the late 1960s called the Banana Splits. The audacity and vulgarity of the comment and the picture is incredible. Given the recent controversy after Indigenous AFL star Adam Goodes was called an ape, first by a young Collingwood fan then through inference by Eddie McGuire, you would think only a person devoid of any cultural sensitivity could find this funny.

The blame, however, must be laid squarely at the feet of SBS. It is their blatant disregard for their own charter and standards that has given the Housos Admins carte blanche to post anything they like, safe in the knowledge the airtime and promotional dollars will continue to flow in. SBS utterly failed its viewers by taking no stand at all against sexism, why would anyone expect them to respond to racism?

SBS does not run the Housos Facebook page – and they remind us ad nauseum. But they have a responsibility to their viewers to only promote and air shows that comply with their charter. Housos is set to be aired on SBS next month. If they have any standards, any respect for the rights of women or Indigenous people, if they want to even pretend that their charter is more than empty rhetoric then they must confront this issue.

If there is a moral fibre left in the operations of SBS they will tell the Housos Admins to either remove the blatant sexist and racist content from their page or pull the plug from future airings of the show. The standards you walk past, SBS, are most certainly the standards you accept.

If you would like to complain to SBS, please do so here.

 

Are Housos out to get the PM?

Written by Benjamin Thomas Jones on March 30th, 2013

This article contains strong language

It’s vulgar, politically incorrect and at times a harrowingly honest look at life in Sydney’s low-income housing areas. Housos, the latest SBS comedy from Fat Pizza creator Paul Fenech, has divided both critics and the general public (even Today Tonight and A Current Affair have been torn with the former calling it ‘degraded’ and the latter hailing the ‘edgy’ comedy). The show is unashamedly crass as it parodies the lives of public housing occupants who are portrayed as lazy, petty criminals, welfare cheats and neglectful parents. Nevertheless, there are a legion of passionate Housos fans who claim the show highlights the realities of a society fractured by deep economic divisions.

Housos has certainly been a commercial success with two television seasons, a stage show and a feature movie. Although combating authority has been a recurring theme, be it the police, Centrelink, or politicians, the show has been largely neutral regarding partisan politics. Relying ultimately on government money through SBS, this should come as no surprise. The official Housos Facebook page, however, has proved an effective outlet for degrading, misogynist attacks on the Prime Minister, Julia Gillard.

It is not clear who the administrators of the Housos Facebook page are but their political affinity is crystal. Far from acting as moderators, deleting inappropriate comments and censuring repeat offenders, the administrators orchestrate ad hominem attacks and provide a safe space for the most feral and sexist comments. Objections are brushed aside and objectors are subjected to similar abuse.

There are too many examples to cite but a brief perusal of the Facebook wall makes the Housos political stance evident. On 8 February the page posted a picture of Gillard in flames which received hundreds of likes. Later that day the status asked, ‘Who’s the biggest cockhead in straya ATM’. The comments overwhelmingly stated it was Gillard. Anthony Mundine, who had fought a few days earlier, and Tony Abbott also received several nominations.

Earlier in the year a status read, ‘gonna thong the fuk out of sum c*nt’. Again, the comments were filled with anti-Gillard hate. One even contained a death threat that was not reported or deleted – indeed it received several likes:

fucking Ginger bitch julia, taking money off us & our defence force, & giving it to other countries & fucking illegal boat people,i cant pay my rent & feed my kids on $225.50 a fortnight gimme a gun & a ticket & i’ll shoot the bitch, yep ill go to jail but ill have food n a roof over my head & me kids will be housed & fed cos they’ll be in the welfare system.

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Seemingly buoyed by the chance to attack the Prime Minister with impunity the statuses and comments became increasingly vile throughout the year. In response to Gillard’s recent visit to West Sydney the administrators claimed, ‘Even the PM watches Housos!! Where else did she get the idea of living in Rooty Hill for a week to mix it up with the locals?? What a plagiarising stooge! Someone go thong slap the bitch’. A few days later the status read, ‘Gaaaaaan gittttttfucccccckeddd …. That’s what Julia’s neighbors will be sayin’.

The commentators tried to outdo each other for vulgarity, misogyny and sheer meanness. One wrote, ‘Just faaaaarkin thong the dirty slut aye’, while another brain had this to add, ‘get back in ur kennel lmfao’. Egged on by the administrators, comments on more recent statuses include, ‘Don’t worry houseos your to good for that Ranga rat ill thong that bitch any day’, ‘Julia Gillard sucks dick!’, ‘thong the fuckwit pm’ and ‘julia gillard is a ranga her voice annoys the fuck outa me she needs a good kick up her ranga twat she is a LYING MOLE’

Some fans do highlight the irony of supposed housing development occupants championing a Liberal government. One commented, ‘how do you think Tony’s going to treat most of your fans? like dogs, that’s how. so stop the fucken political bullshit’. Another drily sated, ‘didn’t realise A Jones ran this page’. The administrators had this reply to those who complain, ‘to all the haters …. And critical pricks… kiss my ass’.  Unperturbed, the invective remains clearly aimed at Gillard. On 30 March the administrators again exhibited thinly veiled misogyny writing, ‘i wanna thong a rangas booty… jus sayin’. It was obvious who they had in mind. Comments included, ‘I’m Sure Gillard will stick it out for thongin!!’ and ‘Thong gillards face’.

The Houos Facebook page seems to have taken its lead from Larry Pickering, the political cartoonist who returned from retirement to attack Gillard by drawing her in sexual positions. While Pickering has a bizarre fixation on the image of Gillard wearing a strap-on dildo (the subject of many of his cartoons), the Housos cater to a more general misogyny with repeated references to Gillard either being beaten, performing sexual acts or having them performed on her.

The glaring question is why? There is no ready answer. Everything about Paul Fenech’s career and work hitherto suggests he is either apolitical or sympathetic to the political left. What is the motivation for these vile and sexist attacks on the Prime Minister? Is it possible he is completely ignorant of his own Facebook page? If not, why would he want to provide a safe place for comments that would be deleted from all but the most vicious right wing blogs?

It will be a gruelling six months for the government as it prepares for the September election in the face of persistently negative polls and a hostile mainstream media. Gillard, however, appears to be facing a war on two fronts. She must not only endure the trials common to all world leaders, she must also endure the tasteless sexism from a noisy minority who still cannot abide a female Prime Minister. Gillard is not a perfect leader and she has not led a perfect government. She deserves the full scrutiny of the media and the public for her political performance. She does not deserve the gendered and sexualised language directed at her. To use the vernacular, Paul Fenech and the administrators of the Housos Facebook page deserve a good thongin.

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Fear and Loathing in Liverpool: My Evening with Geert Wilders

Written by Benjamin Thomas Jones on March 25th, 2013

It was always going to be an awkward night. The arrival of Geert Wilders in Australia had been met with widespread condemnation in the media. Immigration Minister, Chris Bowen, roundly denounced the Dutch parliamentarian’s fierce anti-Islamic views but chose not to deny him a visa. Tony Abbott was more cautious, stating simply that Wilders was “substantially” wrong. A small few were willing to publically defend Wilders. Controversial Liberal Senator, Cory Bernardi, broke party ranks to support his right to be here. Conservative commentator Andrew Bolt spoke in his defence and Alan Jones’ 2GB radio gave the Q Society (who organised the visit) airtime. For my part, I wanted to hear him for myself and make up my own mind. What was he actually proposing?

As soon as I parked my car I could hear the loud chants, “Muslims are welcome, racists are not”. Getting closer, I could see around 50 protesters separated from the delegates by a line of police officers. I was temporarily afraid to walk through the protesters who were screaming abuse at delegates as they arrived. As I write regularly for the online political journal Independent Australia, I decided to stand with the other members of the press and compose myself. As the journalists took turns interviewing protesters with their expensive cameras and voice recorders, I pulled out my mobile phone and decided to do the same.

The first protester I spoke to was a friendly young man named Abdul-Salaam. He was wearing traditional Islamic clothing and handing out pamphlets. I asked him what his motivation was. He replied that he wanted to address the misconceptions about Islam propagated by people like Wilders. I then spoke to another young man named Patrick who proudly announced he was a member of the Socialist Alliance. He commented on the ethnic and racial diversity in Sydney and insisted that Wilders’ racist views were harmful. He also had pamphlets that explained why anti-Islamic sentiments are racist.

I spoke with the protesters for over half an hour, partly to understand their point of view and partly to avoid having to cross the police line. I hoped that they would see me as a reporter, a genuine observer rather than a Wilders sympathiser. I eventually gathered my courage and approached the line. I was stopped by the police and could feel the protesters’ eyes on me as I produced a receipt from my registration and explained I was a paid delegate. I was allowed past but the end of the line was only five or so meters from the protesters. I was not spared their wrath. “Nazi skinhead scum,” one woman screamed at me. I wanted to run over to her and explain my short hair was purely a result of my balding head, not a sign of any extreme political ideology. I wanted to tell her that I abhor racism, that I support refugee rights, that I have done charity work in Africa but I knew it would do no good. Instead I looked shamefully at my feet and accepted the jeers and taunts, wishing desperately the line would move faster.

Security was extremely tight as delegates were required to produce their receipt, photo identification, pass through a metal detector and a bag search before entering the conference room. As I waited in line I began to chat with the delegate next to me. He commented on the hypocrisy of the protesters, claiming tolerance while being intolerant. When he mentioned he had flown down from Brisbane, the large gentleman standing behind us introduced himself. He explained that he was keeping a low profile but was in fact the Liberal National Party member for Dawson, George Christensen. As the two Queenslanders spoke I noticed the Reverend Fred Nile was being ushered to the front of the line. Although I oppose most of what he says, I did feel a moment of sadness observing his dignified and defiant presence. I could only imagine what was screamed as he and his wife braved the protest line.

Inside the venue, a stage was adorned with the flags of Australian, Holland, the United States and Britain. A speaker from the Q Society explained that they had been denied the use of over 30 venues. Freedom of speech was under attack we were told. It felt like we were a group of underground freedom fighters. The rhetoric of the speaker made you temporarily forget we were already living in a free and tolerant society. Wrapped up in the cheers of the enthusiastic crowd, it was easy to believe we were part of a noble struggle for rights.

The first speaker was a Muslim convert to Christianity named Sam Solomon. Articulate and charismatic, he made a clear distinction between Islam as an idea and Muslims as people. It is not racist to be against an idea he assured us. Coming from an Arab and former Muslim, the argument certainly carried more weight than it would have from Wilders. The problem with Islam was that it was not just a religion but an entire political ideology as well. In the West, religion is a small and private part of a person’s life whereas Islamic ethics cover every aspect of an adherent’s life.

I knew from my own experience that what he was saying was wrong. I thought of my friends from Hillsong Church. Their religion absolutely does consume their life. In the Evangelical/Pentecostal vernacular, a Christian would be called a “backslider” if they fitted Solomon’s description. I thought then of my Muslim friends for whom the religion is but a small part of their identity. Nonetheless, I had a lot of sympathy for Solomon. As an active supporter of Open Doors, I knew the terrible persecution Christians, especially converts, did face in some Islamic countries.

Solomon was a polished speaker. He quoted the Qur’an in Arabic and made a convincing case that Islam was not a religion but an intolerant, expansionist ideology. The crowd was cordial but gave only half-hearted, awkward support. Solomon was an evangelist at heart. When he passionately declared that he could be put to death in his home country for boldly declaring that “Jesus is Lord”, the many atheists in the room could only muster a polite clap of approval. When he proudly asserted that the morality of the West was based on Judeo-Christian values, he again clearly isolated himself from many. Having said his piece, the stage was surrendered for the main event.

The crowd leapt to their feet as Geert Wilders took the stage and I felt highly conspicuous as I remained seated. The Dutchman was quick to assert he was not part of the “extreme right” but simply someone who stood for “commonsense” and “liberty”. He explained that he was “marked for death because [he] criticised Islam”. He then unleashed the torrent of invective that has made him infamous. Islam was called, “evil”, “intolerant” and a “mental prison”. The prophet Muhammad was called a “war-lord”, “terrorist” and ‘paedophile”. The crowd roared their approval.

Calling for a “spirit of resistance”, Wilders asked the audience to support the only democratic country in the Middle East, Israel. He then passionately declared that “we all are Israel”. As with Solomon’s Christian apologia, Wilders’ support for the Jewish state only received modest support. I wondered how Christensen was reacting. In the lead-up to the 2010 election he was dogged by anti-Semitic remarks he had made at university. Was he now supporting the idea that we are all Israel? Two rows in front of me I noticed a heavily tattooed skinhead with his arms crossed as others clapped. What a conflicted message this must have been for him. Did he dislike Jews or Muslims more?

Like Solomon, Wilders made “a distinction between the people and the ideology”. Also like Solomon, he insisted “Islam and freedom are incompatible … even when the majority are moderates”. Moderate Muslims, he insisted, “are not preaching Islam at all”. Again, I knew this was plainly wrong. Who was he to define Islam? Who was he to say the Abdul-Salaam, peacefully protesting outside, was not a real Muslim?

Having spent the majority of his speech outlining the “Islamic threat” and highlighting its incompatibility with Western values, Wilders needed just a minute to give his solution. There should be “no more immigration from Islamic countries” he flatly declared. He did not expand, except to say, “no more mosques” either. The crowd were rapturous. I was completely disappointed. That was it? For all his rhetoric and grand standing, that was his serious suggestion!

The problem with Wilders and Solomon is that they do, at times, touch on the very real problem of Islamofascism. The death threats both men receive are real. The misogyny and anti-Semitism openly espoused by some Islamic scholars is real. The terrorism committed by al-Qaeda and other militant Islamic groups is real. But is that really the best solution Wilders could come up with? I wished there was a question and answer time at the end. I desperately wanted to ask, what about the persecuted Christians in Islamic countries? Does he not realise that under his extreme and unworkable solution his support speaker, coming from an Islamic country, would not be allowed in Australia?

The streets where dark and quiet as I walked back to my car. The protesters were gone but the police remained. Driving home, Sigur Rós were playing on the radio which only added to my reflective mood. I thought of my Iraqi barber who is always so friendly and kind to me. He sends his daughter to an Islamic school for the same reason my parents sent me to a Baptist school. There is no evil or indoctrinating intent, he simply believes the standards are better and he wants her to have some grounding in the family faith. I thought also of the many Muslim students I have taught over the years. Thinking of their smiling faces in class, so respectful, so eager to learn, I felt intensely sad for the crude pantomime presented by people like Wilders. Send them all back? What a horrible thought! It is the logic of a person unwilling or unable to look past cultural differences and see potential friends and fellow citizens.

I attended my evening with Geert Wilders with a genuinely open mind but I conclude he is a man with no answers. I openly oppose misogyny, homophobia, anti-Semitism and religious intolerance wherever I see it but it is wrong to stereotype the whole religion this way. A philosophy cannot be judged by its abuses and it is grossly unfair to use the attitudes of the extremists to characterise the moderates. Imagine if we did that with everyone. Does the Westboro Baptist Church fairly represent Christianity? Was Stalinist Russia an archetype atheist state? Australia had an isolationist and xenophobic immigration policy for far too long. It is not something we want to ever return to. Muslims can and do live harmoniously in Australia and add a layer of richness to the multicultural fabric that makes up this great land.

I’m glad Mr Wilders was allowed into our country. I’m glad he was allowed to speak and I’m glad I was allowed to attend. Most of all, I am glad that this country overwhelmingly rejects his extreme policy. It is not just and it is not right. I’m sorry Mr Wilders, I don’t agree with you.

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Puzzling polling: How popular was Howard?

Written by Benjamin Thomas Jones on February 1st, 2013

It was a poll so stupid, I presumed no one would take it seriously. After all, there are lots of silly polls, especially in an election year. I remember having a chuckle to myself in 2007 when Channel Seven asked viewers which party leader they would rather see naked. When Galaxy Research conducted an Australia Day poll for Rupert Murdoch’s News Limited, I presumed it was a facetious damp squib.

The poll asked 1000 people who they judged to be the best prime minster of the past 25 years. Predictably, John Howard took top honours with 35% followed by uncommitted (20%), Kevin Rudd (16%), Bob Hawke (15%), Paul Keating (9%) and poor old Julia Gillard languished in last place on 5%. The results were clear. Howard was the best and Gilalrd was the worst. The headlines were brandished about, not only in Murdoch’s press but Fairfax also and right across the blogosphere. Even fans on Bigfooty.com felt compelled to share the news with perfectly impartial commentary:

I guess this poll just confirms what we were all thinking. A time of steady and real leadership. Good policy and good implementation. I guess the results speak for themselves.

Please excuse you me if I depart from my usual tone but, are you kidding me??? Can nobody see the glaring problem here???

The last 25 years takes us back to 1988. Between 1988 and 2013 there have been four Labor prime ministers but only one Liberal prime minister. Popularity fluctuates but on a two-party preferred basis, Liberal and Labor generally sit close to 50% each. So this poll has asked Labor voters which of four past leaders they like the best BUT we are left with the ridiculous situation where Liberal voters are asked which of the one, solitary Liberal leader they preferred. Galaxy has deliberately distorted this poll under the pathetically limp excuse that it wanted to establish the best prime minister in a generation.

Needing such a flimsy pretext to produce a twisted poll that reveals precisely nothing about people’s opinions concerning our recent leaders, it could be hoped that it would quickly go away. No such luck. It beggars belief, but people are taking this poll seriously. Jumping on this favourable result, Gerald Henderson, head of the conservative Sydney Institute, argued in the Sydney Morning Herald that Howard’s popularity was key to Tony Abbott’s push for the Lodge. Even left-leaning publications such as The Punch, ran an article on the poll asking why we are nostalgic for Howard.

Given the skewed nature of the poll, what, if anything, does it actually tell us? Galaxy, it should be noted, does have a history of accurate election polls. Presumably, they spread out the 1000 people to try and get an even mix of Liberal and Labor voters. If we accept that roughly half must have been Liberal/National or further right in their political affiliation – the burning question is how did Howard do so poorly? Surely, given the absurd 25 year guideline, he should be expected to claim closer to 50%? This poll reveals, if it reveals anything, that 65% of people preferred Labor leadership including a healthy percentage of nominal Liberal supporters.

Far from a glowing report, that is an indictment on Howard’s legacy. But perhaps the real story here is why, in an election year, would Galaxy and Murdoch want to create a false impression that Howard is the best and Gillard is the worst? Especially considering Abbott has consistently said he wants to return to Howard’s ‘golden years’, you can’t help but wonder what guidelines are in place to ensure fairness and accuracy in the mainstream media. Politicians on both sides regularly say that the only poll worth noticing is the one taken on election night. I think they may be right.

Post Script

Although I have not seen one journalist pick up on the utterly flawed nature of this poll, thankfully, some of the comments on the various articles did. Here is a quick example.

“An eminent committee consisting of 3 Liberals and a Liberal have voted and the results are in. Can’t argue with facts like that.”

“Since when is Murdoch Press says Howard’s the best Australian PM, one, official, or two, news?”

“Ridiculous. Could it be because he was the only LNP leader of the generation, while Labor was split four ways?”

 

In defence of Australia Day: Keep the 26th of Jan!

Written by Benjamin Thomas Jones on January 27th, 2013

I am not an Aboriginal Australian. I do not have that honour. But like many Australians I have a deep respect for the ancient culture that possessed this land for tens of thousands of years before the arrival of the First Fleet. I had the privilege of being in the House of Representatives on 13 February 2008 when Kevin Rudd apologised to Australia’s Indigenous peoples. I saw firsthand the incredible outpouring of emotions and am keenly aware of the power of symbolism to assist healing and reconciliation. It has been suggested that moving Australia Day from 26 January will be a similar gesture of respect and goodwill between Aboriginal and non-Aboriginal people. While I understand the argument, I fear it would have the opposite effect.

The most articulate call to change the date of Australia Day was made in 2009 by Professor Mick Dodson. Having won the prestigious Australian of the Year award, Dodson, expressed the view that Australia can ‘do better’ noting that, ‘many of our people call it invasion day’.

Every year since, as Australia Day approaches, more room is being provided for Aboriginal voices in the public domain and this is a good thing. The first Aboriginal member of the ACT Legislative Assembly, Chris Bourke has recently said, ‘It is simply not right to have this day, with its implicit assumption that the invasion of Australia was a good thing for all concerned, as our national day’. I do not believe this is a fair reflection of what Australia Day means. Australia Day does not celebrate the suffering of Aboriginal people but the beginning of a national story.

As an Australian of European descent, I am sorry for the brutal dispossession that followed first contact. I am sorry for the rape, murder and other acts of violence suffered by Aboriginal people. I am sorry for the families that were needlessly broken apart. But one thing I can’t be sorry for is the arrival of the British on 26 January. I am glad they came. If they hadn’t, I would not be here. I am also glad the Italians, Greeks and other Europeans arrived after World War II. I am glad the Vietnamese arrived in the 1980s and I am glad for the handful of boat people fleeing persecution who manage to negotiate our draconian immigration policy and find shelter on these shores. Australia in the twenty-first century is home to people from virtually every country in the world. Each wave of immigration has enriched Australia as a whole. I am proud to live in one of the most peaceful and multicultural nations on the planet.\

I recently had the opportunity to work on two book projects with a talented Aboriginal academic named Anthony Dillon. In an article for The Drum he has said, ‘It is interesting that some Aboriginal people see January 26 as a source of emotional suffering, while others view the very same day as an opportunity to have fun’. Dillon makes the important point that national days have only the meaning we give to them. Christmas Day has evolved over the years and most non-Christian Australians feel comfortable celebrating 25 December with or without a religious element. Australia Day has also evolved. The 1888 centenary was a celebration of Britishness. By 1988, the narrative had changed. It became a story of inclusion and 26 January is now one of the most popular days for immigrants from around the world to be presented with Australian citizenship.

Many Aboriginal Australians still face incredible hardship and as a nation we should make it our first priority to take steps towards positive change. Changing the date of Australia Day, however, is likely to divide the nation rather than unite it in the way the apology did. When would we change it to? 1 January, of course, is already a public holiday. 25 April belongs to the Anzac legacy and shouldn’t be broadened to include a general celebration. Without a viable alternative, a move away from 26 January will receive a negative backlash, not only from conservatives, but from many members of the community who have only ever seen it as a day to celebrate all that is good about the country. Changing the day will do nothing to address the poverty of many remote Aboriginal communities, the baleful gap in life expectancy or the limited access to health care, good education and quality employment. If these goals were earnestly pursued we would have all the more to celebrate on 26 January.

The national anthem calls on Australians to rejoice for we are young and free. It is our freedom, above all, that is worth celebrating. Australians are free to spend 26 January any way they like. Many take the opportunity to wave the flag and celebrate the nation. Many others do not reflect at all on the national story and simply take the opportunity to have fun with their friends. Others still choose to spend the day solemnly commemorating the injustices suffered by Aboriginal Australians through colonisation. There is no right or wrong way to spend the day and that in itself is a blessing.

The first Aboriginal person to receive a knighthood, Sir Douglas Nicholls, famously said to the greater Australian community, ‘we want to walk with you, we don’t wish to walk alone’. It is a beautiful sentiment. While the wrongs of the past must be acknowledged, the fact that this land has provided hope and home to waves of immigrants from around the world since 26 January 1788 is worthy of celebration. That we have grown into one of the world’s oldest and most peaceful democracies is also worth celebrating. Above all, the fact that Aboriginal and non-Aboriginal Australians can walk together, on the sports field, in the business world, in parliament, in our schools and in our communities, is truly worthy of celebration. Let us keep 26 January as the national day and be ever vigilant to ensure that Aboriginal and non-Aboriginal people walking together is something both sides can celebrate.

Dr Benjamin Thomas Jones is a historian at the Australian National University. His next book, Project Republic, will come out through Black Inc on 2 June 2013.

 

If Slipper is guilty, what about Abbott?

Written by Benjamin Thomas Jones on January 11th, 2013

Jesus Christ once said, “let he who is without sin cast the first stone”. The Australian political version would be, let he without dubious expenses sling the first mud. If what goes around truly does come around then Tony Abbott may live to regret his attacks on Peter Slipper. The former Speaker of the House of Representatives has faced the full wrath of the Liberal Party since choosing to defect in November 2011. Despite being unofficially told that he would not be given pre-selection for his seat of Fisher, the fact that he effectively gave the ALP two extra votes on the floor (the Liberals would lose Slipper’s vote while Labor would gain former Speaker Harry Jenkin’s vote) was seen as an unacceptable betrayal.

Less than four months into the role, Slipper’s former staffer James Ashby accused him of misusing cab charges and of sexually harassing him. The episode became hugely embarrassing as crude text messages became public. With his old friend and former ministerial colleague in the Howard government, Mal Brough, waiting in the wings for Slipper’s seat, Tony Abbott went on the offensive. The presumption of innocence was never afforded to Slipper by the Coalition or the scandal-hungry media.

Abbott claimed Julia Gillard showed bad judgement in appointing Slipper to the Speaker’s chair. The allegation was absurdly hypocritical. Had John Howard also shown bad judgement when he made Slipper his parliamentary secretary in 2002? Had Abbott shown poor judgement when the Liberal Party gave Slipper pre-selection in 2010? The accusations of sexual harassment and cab charge abuse were thrown out as groundless, politically motivated attacks. Australian Federal Police have since accused Slipper of wrongly charging $1194 to the Commonwealth when visiting local vineyards in Canberra in 2010. He offered to pay this money back but the Department of Finance has broken its own protocol by refusing to allow the money to be refunded.

Slipper’s crime is very minimal. Ministers are entitled to compensation for travel, food and accommodation needed when carrying out their duties. The line can be hazy. If two MPs have dinner together at a vineyard is that business or pleasure? What if they are friends and they discuss both government policy and their kids? With MPs having many complex entitlements, it is understandable that some overcharging occurs. To keep things in perspective, over half a million pounds was paid back by British MPs in the wake of the 2009 parliamentary expense scandal. Slipper’s $1194 seems very minor in comparison.

The leader of the opposition has no sympathy for Slipper and is still questioning his character and presuming his guilt. “Why did the prime minister ever think that the gentleman in question was fit and proper to be the Speaker of our country?” demanded Abbott on Tuesday. But if Slipper is not fit and proper to be Speaker then Abbott is definitely not fit and proper to be prime minister.

Tony Abbott released Battlelines in 2009. It was a book designed to set the tone for his leadership and outline his vision for Australia. From his Sydney seat of Warringah, Abbott flew to Canberra to discuss the book at the National Press Club on 28 July. While it can probably be argued that the Press Club visit was legitimate business – even if it was to discuss and sign copies of his book – how would he explain his trip to Melbourne on 3 August for a dinner event at a Dymocks bookstore? Abbott returned to Melbourne as well as visiting Brisbane and Perth to promote his book. In all, he charged $5,689.36 to the Commonwealth for business that seems personal not parliamentary. That was only the air fares. Including drivers to and from his book events, the taxpayer has put $6,651.96 towards the promotion of his book.

Was Abbott conducting parliamentary business? Certainly that will be his defence. The Dymocks events in Melbourne and Perth are particularly damning. The timing of the trips strongly suggests that book promotion was the primary purpose. It is possible, of course, that Abbott also conducted legitimate business in between signing copies of Battlelines – just as it is possible Slipper conducted legitimate business in between glasses of Clonakilla winery’s famous shiraz viognier. From the point of view of the tax payer, keeping Slipper boozed up is certainly cheaper than Abbott’s self-promotion.

Common sense would suggest that both cases are murky and that both MPs should be allowed to simply pay the money back. Common sense, unfortunately, is not the stock in trade of either politicians or the media. If Slipper is found guilty he will be forced to resign from parliament and to forfeit his parliamentary pension of $157 000 per annum. He could also face jail time for his $1194 oversight. As a devout Catholic, Abbott would be wise to follow some more advice from Jesus, “judge not lest ye be judged”. If Slipper does end up in the Slammer, the next stop on the Battlelines book tour may be an adjoining cell.

 

The Spirit of Ghandi lives: But no one seems to care

Written by Benjamin Thomas Jones on November 19th, 2012

Mahatma Gandhi is revered as the ‘Father of the Nation’ in his native India but his legend and legacy belong to the world. He is an inspiration for activists around the globe who protest violence, tyranny and oppression wherever they find it. He is a reminder also that true revolutions take place in the heart and that batons and rubber bullets can only stall social change. Fighting British rule in India, Gandhi regularly used hunger strikes as a non-violent political weapon. Reflecting on the principles of revolutionary pacifism, Gandhi quipped, ‘First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win’. 65 years after his death, the fight for civil and political rights is as fierce as ever. In the year 2000, Irom Sharmila began a hunger strike in the spirit of Gandhi. Incredibly, she has abstained from food and water for 12 years, being forcibly fed through a tube. Unlike Gandhi, she cannot seem to get past the stage of being ignored, even in India.

On 2 November 2000, the Malom Massacre took place in the north-Indian state of Manipur. Retaliating to a rebel attack, soldiers shot and killed ten innocent civilians waiting at a bus stop in the town of Malom. The guilty party could not be prosecuted as they were covered under the auspices of the Armed Forces (Special Powers) Act which grants impunity to soldiers working in ‘disturbed areas’. Irom Sharmila was outraged and vowed to abstain from food, water and even brushing her teeth until AFSPA was repealed. This month marks 12 years of continual peaceful protest but tragically, the end seems no nearer than when it began.

The fact that Sharmila’s protest has not yielded results yet is not the issue. Gandhi was first imprisoned by the British in 1922 – a quarter of a century before Indian independence was finally achieved. AFSPA has been condemned by Amnesty International, Human Rights Watch and the United Nations but, like many oppressive laws, it may be decades yet before it is finally overturned. Government resistance is to be expected. What is remarkable, however, is the sheer apathy in the West and in India itself to this heroic protest.

Habitual apathy is the ultimate result of an information overload. In our globalised age, we have become accustomed to having instant access to more data than we could possibly consume in a lifetime. Growing up in the 1980s, before the internet became a staple of every home, our family library was crowned with an Encyclopaedia Britannica set. I was convinced as a young boy, if I could read and retain every book, I would possess the entirety of human knowledge. It was thrilling in the early 1990s to purchase a digital copy and to realise all of those lofty volumes could be reduced to a single compact disc. Today, it is still thrilling but also daunting to fathom what a drop in the ocean that set is when compared to the endless expanse of the information superhighway. With access to information at truly brobdingnagian proportions, perhaps we could be excused for throwing up our arms and declaring, ‘Enough! I just don’t care!’

Has the global West given in to habitual apathy and succumbed to the inevitable social inertia that follows? Driving though Sydney’s notoriously conservative Hills District in April, I was shocked to see traffic signs and bus shelters covered in Kony 2012 posters. The corresponding Youtube video was watched nearly 100 million times. Seemingly overnight, social media sites became obsessed with bringing this Ugandan militia leader to justice. It mattered little that Joseph Kony had left Uganda in 2006 or that the film was riddled with inaccuracies. Nor was it important that the film and the campaign reduced the complex tragedy of African child soldiers to a simple equation – catch the bad guy. The campaign was sexy and it was marketable. Dismissed as slacktivism by some, Kony 2012, with its catchy slogans, slick posters and digital appeal, broke the spell, albeit temporarily, of habitual apathy.

Herein lays the challenge for children of the Information Age. With an endless stream of sources available to us on our smartphones, tablets, computers and televisions, it is up to us to filter the information we are fed and develop a critical eye. The lazy mind will respond to this digital bombardment by either revelling in gullibility or sinking into a nasty cynicism. Only the brave and the brilliant will rise to meet the challenge of the age – to use the incredible access to information as a weapon. The average citizen is more empowered than ever to run fact checks on claims, to read newspapers from around the world and to take part in online discussions. We can hold our leaders and our mainstream media to account, if we choose.

With discernment, determination and a careful eye, the gulf between Irom Sharmila’s campaign against AFSPA and Invisible Children’s campaign against Joseph Kony becomes readily apparent. Why then is Kony a global celebrity while Sharmila and her 12 years hunger strike is virtually unknown? Have we been tricked by a marketing sleight of hand? Have we substituted online posters and Facebook ‘likes’ for genuine activism? Or is it simply the case that, as ever, a comforting lie is preferable to an inconvenient truth? Gandhi once said ‘even if you are a minority of one, the truth is the truth’. In an age where millions join a cause one month to abandon it the next, those words seem pertinent. Our unprecedented access to knowledge should be seen as a blessing but with it comes the responsibility to carefully separate fluff and fairytales from spirit and substance. Meanwhile, Irom Sharmila enters her thirteenth year of fasting. The spirit of Gandhi still has a voice, waiting to be heard.

 

Save Parkes Place: Why Symbols Matter

Written by Benjamin Thomas Jones on October 30th, 2012

An international visitor to Australia would be excused for thinking this country is still a British colony under the control of the royal family. Evidence of the British royals can be found in every state and territory (indeed two of our six states are directly named for a British royal). Streets, buildings, statues and other memorials named George, Edward and, of course, Victoria are literally everywhere.  The present monarch, Queen Elizabeth II, who recently enjoyed her diamond jubilee, has hardly been forgotten. Hospitals, parks, suburbs and roads across the country all bear her name and, of course, her image is on the reverse of every Australian coin. Many schools and defence force buildings also have a portrait in honour of the monarch. The British royals are nothing if not revered.

In contrast, Australians take a humbler approach to our native heroes. With a cultural distrust of politicians, we are more inclined to endure our leaders than celebrate them. Henry Parkes, who more than anyone deserves to be called the father of our country, is one of the scare few who have risen above our perpetual tall poppy syndrome to achieve near-universal applause. Parkes, like the Queen, does have many memorials, especially in Canberra. But what message does it send when a road named in his honour is renamed for the Queen?

I started the Save Parkes Place petition on 23 October 2012 when I read in the Canberra Times that Charles and Camilla planned to visit the capital to ‘officially rename Parkes Place as Queen Elizabeth Terrace’. There were a few comments expressing disapproval but overall it seemed that people were quite happy with this arrangement. I was furious. Could you imagine a Gandhi memorial being renamed in India? Could you imagine a Washington memorial being renamed in the United States or a Mandela memorial in South Africa? Whether a person approves of the monarchy or not is irrelevant. If a generic Main Street or South Street was dedicated to the Queen few eyebrows would have been raised but to take away a street named after the father of federation is scandalous.

The day after I launched the petition just 70 people had signed. Significantly, the story had been picked up by The Canberra Times with the headline, ‘Parkes Place renaming sparks a royal row’. Even better, the article was republished in The Age. The comments were extraordinary. Some people were for the change, but it was heartening to see that I was not alone in wishing this country paid more respect to the men and women who have tirelessly worked to make it the envy of the world.

Sam from Adelaide stated: ‘Sir Henry Parks was a founder and the father of our nation, to remove his name from a land mark in the nations (sic) capital is an insult to every Australian, past, present, and future’. A Canberran using the name Merit not birth right claimed, ‘The honour of having a place named after you should be based on merit and there are plenty of deserving Australians who have real achievements’.

In response to the petition, the National Capital Authority was quick to point out that, ‘only the stretch of Parkes Place skirting Lake Burley Griffin would be renamed Queen Elizabeth Terrace’. The open space where the Aboriginal Tent Embassy sits will still be called Parkes Place. This misses the point entirely. As ST from Sydney put it, ‘I don’t care how small the part of Australia is – a road, a suburb/town, a park – it is insulting to overlook our own history in reverence to our one time overlords’.

While the news coverage has been wonderful the petition itself has attracted just 250 signatures. Most people are still not aware of the renaming much less the protest. Still, it is clear that many people simply do not care enough to take 90 seconds out of their schedule. The stinging truth about democracy is that you tend to get what you deserve. As a patriot and a nationalist, I love this country and I want to see it mature into a vibrant, tolerant meritocracy where we place value and honour on those who selflessly work for the community and nation. Australia has historically looked outwards for inspiration, especially to our great and powerful friends in the United Kingdom and United States. It is important that we do not forget to honour also our first Australians and the migrants from every corner of the globe who have settled here. We rightly acknowledge the mistakes of the past but we must also celebrate the things we have done well. Parkes’ vision of a united country set the wheels in motion for a federation he would not live to see. I urge you to take 90 seconds and sign the petition at Change.org. Let’s Save Parkes Place.

To sign the petition please Click Here

 

 

Assessing the Legacy of Robert Menzies

Written by Benjamin Thomas Jones on October 29th, 2012

Robert Gordon Menzies is remembered for being Australia’s longest serving Prime Minister spending an incredible 18 years in office between 1939-41 and 1949-1966. His legacy, however, is politicised and fiercely contested as he was the founder and inaugural leader of the Liberal Party of Australia. Despite retiring from public life in 1966, Menzies’ long shadow continued to shape Australian politics for decades. On 27 February 1992 Prime Minister Paul Keating viciously attacked the notion put forward by his eventual successor, John Howard, that the 1950s had been a ‘golden age’ for Australia (Barnes, 2003, 30). Keating, and the broader Labor narrative, has described the Menzies era as a period of stagnation and of racial and gender inequality. Despite this, when the Age asked leading historians and political writers to rank Australian prime ministers from best to worst, Menzies came in second, beaten only by John Curtin (Age, 2004). Menzies’ contribution to Australian and international politics can be judged in three distinct categories; his war-time leadership, his post-war policies and his crusade against communism. Finally, the party that he founded must be analysed. Does it still reflect his original vision? By breaking down Menzies’ long period of leadership into sections and ignoring both the plentiful hagiographical and vitriolic accounts, his contribution can be more fairly assessed.

Menzies’ first term as prime minister is generally viewed as unsuccessful. He gained the leadership of the ruling United Australian Party following the death of Joseph Lyons on 7 April 1939. The political situation in Europe was already menacing and by September war had broken out. Menzies informed the nation that Great Britain had declared war on Germany and that ‘as a result, Australia is also at war’ (Waters, 2012, 1). This reflected Menzies’ core belief that Australia was not an independent nation but a member state of the Commonwealth, inextricably tied to Britain and the wider Empire. A federal election on 21 September 1940 returned a hung parliament and Menzies retained the prime ministership with the support of Victorian Independent MPs, Arthur Coles and Alexander Wilson. Early the next year, however, Menzies left for Britain and spent four months discussing war strategy with Winston Churchill and other members of the Imperial War Cabinet. He was roundly criticised for spending so much time abroad at such a crucial moment and returned home to find he had lost the support of his own party and was forced to resign (Grose, 2007, 20). The Independents crossed the floor and Labor leader, John Curtin, assumed the prime ministership.

Had Menzies ended his political career at this point, he likely would be remembered as failure, a footnote to the greater history of John Curtin. In many ways, Menzies contributed to Curtin and to the emerging sense of Australian nationalism by being so staunchly Imperial-minded. Menzies considered Australia to be automatically at war with Germany following Great Britain’s declaration. Trained as a lawyer, he would have known this was not legally the case, but in the mind of one of Australia’s last great empire men, morally, it was so. In contrast, Curtin insisted Australia make its own declaration of war against Japan in December 1941 (Boyce, 2008, 25). Curtin further distanced himself from Menzies by declaring soon after that ‘Australia looks to America, free of any pangs as to our traditional links or kingship to the United Kingdom’ (Curran, 2011, 11). Although as James Curran has noted, the phrasing was a revelation of realpolitik not an ‘epiphany of Australian independence and a rejection of the nation’s Britishness (2011, 12). Nevertheless, Menzies’ apparent poor judgement was a key factor in Labor’s success that would continue beyond the war with Ben Chifley defeating Menzies and the newly formed Liberals at the 1946 election.

Menzies regained the prime ministership in 1949 with a strong anti-communist platform. He had used his time in opposition to forge a new ideology and a new political party that would see him rebound to become the most successful prime minister in Australian history. In his famous Forgotten People speeches which were broadcast in Sydney and Melbourne during World War II, Menzies outlined a new philosophy. He took the political emphasis off supporting business and championed the cause of the middle class. Menzies described his forgotten people as ‘those people who are constantly in danger of being ground between the upper and the nether milestones of a false class war (Warhaft, 2004, 149). Menzies actively countered Labor’s dominant discourse which saw them as the champions of the working class. Menzies rejected the notion of class warfare and insisted that Labor were ignoring the honest, middle class, ‘the backbone of this country’, by pursuing an outdated Marxist notion (Warhaft, 2004, 149). It was Menzies’ appeal to the forgotten people that underscored, not only his own success, but the subsequent success of the party he founded. Decades later, the appeal to Howard’s battlers, who delivered him four consecutive electoral victories, bore the hallmark of Menzies.

Menzies was a prime minister of his time and was consumed with the fight against international communism. As the Iron Curtin descended over Eastern Europe, the Allied powers were coming to grips with a nuclear armed Soviet Union and a growing sphere of communist influence. Menzies’ attempt to ban the Australian Communist Party was partly driven by political expediency. He had hoped that Labor would oppose him, allowing him to portray them as weak on the issue. As it turned out, Labor supported the bill only for the High Court to reject it as unconstitutional. Menzies responded with a referendum to change the constitution and allow the government to ban the Communist Party on 22 September 1951. In one of the closest referenda in Australian history, Queensland, Western Australia and Tasmania voted for the change with New South Wales, Victoria and South Australia opposing it. In total, 49.44 percent of voters supported the change (Parliament of Australia website).

The attempt to ban the Communism Party gives historians a key insight into Menzies’ thinking. This was the era of McCarthyism, the Korean War and the Domino Theory. The Petrov Affair was possibly the most dramatic Cold War episode to take place on Australian soil. Vladimir Petrov, a KGB agent stationed in Canberra, organised with ASIO officials to defect to the West, however, he made no plans for his wife to defect with him. Dramatic scenes unfolded at Sydney airport where KGB officials forcibly boarded Evdokia Petrov on a plane for Moscow. Amidst passionate anti-communist protest, Menzies made the decision to grant Evdokia political asylum and she was intercepted when the plane refuelled in Darwin. The move met with wide approval. The defections occurred shortly the 1954 election which Labor was widely expected to win. Labor accused Menzies of timing the incident to whip up anti-communist fear and to take the political emphasis off local issues. Shortly after the Petrov affair Menzies established a royal commission into Soviet espionage (Lowe, 1999, 123). David Lowe has described Menzies crusade against communism as the ‘great world struggle’ (Lowe, 1999). In this regard, Menzies used his position in Australia to make a strong contribution to the international movement against communist expansion.

Menzies’ contributions to Australian and international politics are vast. He was the founder of Australia’s most successful political party, which despite its short history has spent more time in office than any other. Key to the success of the Liberals has been Menzies’ forgotten people. Menzies inflicted a mortal wound on the workers-bourgeois dichotomy that had given the Labor Party such a strong primary base. In this regard, Menzies was crucial, not only in shaping the Liberals but also in shaping Labor which had to reinvent itself as an alternative government. Menzies influence continued well past his death. Paul Kelly has noted, ‘anyone [who] doubts the influence of … Menzies, should examine the story of Howard and Keating’ (Kelly, 2010, 13). In the international arena too, Menzies was an active player. In peace time and war, he always saw himself and Australia as key players in a global struggle. He would remain attached to the British Commonwealth and the broader democratic fight against communism.

So what is Menzies legacy? The obvious answer would seem to be the Liberal Party of Australia but in politics all is never what it seems. The modern Liberal Party, ironically, is simply a conservative party. The ‘broad church’ which Howard boasted of includes only moderate and extreme conservatives, both well to the political right of Menzies. This is precisely the opposite of what the founder intended. Explaining why he didn’t follow the United Kingdom’s example and use the name, Conservatives, Menzies said, ‘We took the name “Liberal” because we were determined to be a progressive party … in no sense reactionary (Menzies, 1969, 286). Former Liberal Prime Minister, Malcolm Fraser recently lamented, ‘politics has moved so far to the right there are liberals in the party, but not too damn many’(Australian, 2010). Despite leading the Liberals to three electoral victories, in retirement Fraser quit the party, convinced it has betrayed Menzies’ legacy. He has said, ‘Today’s Liberals call themselves conservatives with pride, but [Menzies] would have considered the term an insult’ (Australian, 2010).

Menzies may well have had a greater impact on the Labor Party than his own. Menzies defeated the Laobr Party at seven elections between 1949 and 1963 with Harold Holt and John Gorton winning in 1966 and 1969 respectively before Labor finally returned to power in 1972. The psychological damage of nine consecutive losses on Australia’s oldest party can hardly be overstated. Menzies was an unrivalled master of wedge politics and his Machiavellian use of communist paranoia literally split the Labor party in two in 1955. True believers in the Labor Party often ask where is today’s John Curtin or Ben Chifley. In truth, it is not that these men are gone but the party they served. By discovering the forgotten people, Menzies carved out an election winning majority and delivered a terminal blow to the workers-bourgeoisie binary that had served Labor so well. Since their historic first term in 1904, Labor have only had two periods of sustained political dominance. They ruled from 1941-1949, defeated in an attempt to nationalise the banks. Despite Whitlam’s three years from 1972-1975, Labor would not enjoy sustained success again till the Hawke-Keating years from 1983-1996 on a platform that included selling major public assets. The party is plainly not what it used to be and the hulking figure of Menzies can take much credit for the transformation.

Menzies’ legacy will continue to be contested. The Liberals religiously venerate their founder despite having embraced the conservatism he was so concerned with avoiding. The Labor party continue to denounce Menzies as a political dinosaur, yet during his lengthy time in office, he transformed the ALP more than they transformed themselves. What can be said is that he effectively united the diverse anti-Labor elements and formed a devastatingly effective electoral strategy. His ideas, particularly about the importance of education and social capital, are largely gone from his own party yet his cult remains vibrant with conservative lectures, research centres and think-tanks named in his honour. Menzies’ biographers include passionate supporters and fierce critics. Perhaps the only thing both sides will always agree on, is that his contribution and influence was a large as any Australian leader before or since.

 

References

Barnes, G. (2003). What’s Wrong with the Liberal Party? Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.

Boyce, P. (2008).The Queen’s Other Realms: The Crown and Its Legacy in Australia, Canada and New Zealand. Sydney: Federation Press.

Curran, J. (2011). Curtin’s Empire. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.

Curtin: Our Greatest PM. (18 December 2004). The Age.

Grose, P. (2007). A Very Rude Awakening: The Night the Japanese Midget Subs Came to Sydney Harbour. Sydney: Allen and Unwin.

Kelly, P. (2010). The March of Patriots: The Struggle for Modern Australia. Melbourne: University of Melbourne Press.

Lowe, D. (1999). Menzies and the ‘Great World Struggle’: Australia’s Cold War 1948-54. Sydney: University of New South Wales Press.

Massola, J. (27 October 2010) Malcolm Fraser takes swipe at successor John Howard over legacy. Australian.

Menzies, R. (1969).  Afternoon Light, Adelaide: Penguin.

Parliament of Australia. (2012). Referendum Results. Parlinfo.aph.gov.au, Retrieved 25 September 2012 from                 http://parlinfo.aph.gov.au/parlInfo/search/display/display.w3p;db=HANDBOOK;id=handbook%2Fnewhandbook%2F2008-12-    19%2F0067;query=Id%3A%22handbook%2Fnewhandbook%2F2008-12-19%2F0066%22

Warhaft, S. (2004). Well May We Say: The Speeches That Made Australia. Melbourne: Black Inc.

Waters, C. (2012). Australia and Appeasement: Imperial Foreign Policy and the Origins of World War II. London: I.B. Tauris.

 

 

On Surnames

Written by Benjamin Thomas Jones on October 3rd, 2012

‘What’s in a name?’ mused the Bard. ‘That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet’. Romeo and Juliet were certainly not fussed but broadly speaking society has frowned on the call to ‘doff thy name’. Names are fascinating. The study of names is a distinct academic field known as onomastics. We need a given name for a very obvious reason – it gives us an identity. Whether we have prison issued numbers or extravagant appellations, people need to distinguish us from the person next to us. Surnames are a bit different. Deeply symbolic and tied to history, a surname is seen as an inheritance. Have they retained their significance or in this enlightened, post-modern, deconstructionist world, are we free to change or even disregard surnames altogether?

The history of surnames differs from culture to culture but they generally arose as an administrative tool. Particularly as populations increased and the government census became more common, a surname or family name would help identify one group from another. The aristocracy was the first to employ surnames as a way of tracing their noble lineage. In my own case, Jones is a Welsh name meaning the son of John which, suitably enough, is my father’s name. Peasants would eventually take last names to indicate their clan or function. Jim the Baker eventually became Jim Baker. Richard the Blacksmith, became Richard Smith and so on. Occupations were originally as much an inheritance as any physical possessions. Before the Industrial Revolution, it was rare for young men to do anything besides what their father had done.

How important are surnames today? We are certinally past the point where they indicate either our noble lineage or our profession. They are still needed from an administrative point of view – especially if your tribe has blossomed like the Joneses! There is still a nice link to the past by carrying on the family name. It is a touch phallocentric as, generally speaking, women still forfeit their surname at marriage and the children carry on the father’s legacy. Surnames are clannish, tribal things that bring comfort, identity and a sense of continuity but what if your last name is awful? Is there not a point where the evolutionary nature of language means keeping an unfortunate last name is just silly?

There are many examples where evolutionary linguistics have left people with a surname that doesn’t quite sit right. Take, for example, rugby league legend, Johnny Raper, Apple CEO Tim Crook, singer Bruce Cockburn and American sprint star Tyson Gay. Now 100 years ago, all of these were perfectly normal surnames but by luck of the draw they all have very bad modern meanings. Johnny, let us be clear, is not a rapist. The jury is out whether Tim is a crook but, for the sake of argument, let’s presume his innocence. Bruce (presumably) does not suffer from a burning sensation down below and if he does there are things modern medicine can do to fix that. Finally, Tyson is not gay … not that there’s anything wrong with that!

These are a few celebrity examples but there are many more everyday people with surnames that are less than appealing. Often, in this globalised world, it is simply the result of different things sounding funny in different languages. Colon, for example, is a perfectly acceptable surname in Spain but it would not bode overly well in an English speaking country. Similarly, Ho is a fine name in China but if the family moves to Australia it is probably not what a young girl wants to be called repeatedly by students and teachers alike. Spare a thought for those who have inherited the surnames, Belch, Cuck, Dinkle, Gunts, Jerker, Pugh or, my personal favourite, Wildonger.

What would you do with an unfortunate surname? Is it as simple as going to court and having a name change? When would you do it? As a child, adolescent or adult? Are you letting down your parents and your ancestors or are you doing a wonderful favour to your children? As a Jones, I certainly don’t feel any need to carry on the family name but I do wonder how much it would hurt my parents if I changed my last name. Would it be a complete rejection of them? I think Muhammad Ali had the right idea. Our name is so central to our identity, it must ultimately be something that we can be proud of and we can love. Ali, like many African Americans, saw his surname as a slave name and rejected it. His new name reflected his faith and who he was as a free man. Malcolm X did the same thing. Our parents are important, our history is important but we have only one shot at this life. We must not cower under a name we do not love. Be who you want to be and love who you are. Let freedom reign.